Tuesday, June 14, 2011

certainly i'm in debted baby, certainly, certainly...

It hasn't been my year.
I know this fact seems obvious to most, but after careful observation from the past six months, it has fully hit me like a brick wall, "2011 is not my year."  
It all started as a glorious attempt to ring in the new year with my bestie in the magical city of Toronto, with more then enough drinks. But the club was packed tighter then a sardine can, everyone sweaty and doing the fist pump [that should have been my warning right there!] and then, no kiss. Yup, you heard me right. No new years kiss. Why yes my friends, this may come as a shock to you all, as I am usually quite set in that department - but that's besides the point. You'd actually be even more tickled to know that I've never had a new years kiss- sure, I've made out under the stairs in high school and in the pouring rain like a scene outta Hollywood, but never after that ten second countdown when the new year is suppose to bring this so-called hope and new beginnings. 
Regardless of my lack of kiss this year or all the other 19, I am still certain this is when my luck for the year crashed and burned. At first it was suddle, being let down by the person I truly cared for, to having car troubles. Nothing really new there I suppose, as my car wouldn't even be bought for 5cents on eBay by user name I'llBuyAnyonesCrap1. Then a few warnings came, my uncle grew sick. But like a silver lining, I got offered an unbelievable job to work on a yacht in Italy. Just as I think my year was in an upward turn for the better, it crashed 100x harder. All thanks to some inconsiderable jerk who hit my puppy and didn't turn back to see if he was okay - he wasn't.
Okay I tell myself, it surely can't get any worse. Next thing I know my foot is fractured, my uncle dies, and I'm being let go from my job and on the next flight back to Toronto - missing the funeral by a mere 24 hours. Thank god my sense of timing was taken from me the previous year, or I could've added that to my list too! The icing on the cake? Just recently my grandma, which I admittedly call my best friend, has been in and out of the hospital. The very next day, I am taking a leisurely stroll to collect my thoughts and create a new 'life plan' for the year, as mine clearly isn't working out for me, and what to my wondering eye appears BUT A BEAR up the road. Usually I couldn't care less if I saw a wild animal [just not wolves, but I think I have a good reason for that one!]. But this biiiiiiiig brown bear was 10x bigger then I'd ever imagined one to be in the zoo, not to mention it was missing the barricade been it and me. Remembering all the "If you see a bear" info from a pamphlet they hand out, outside a grocery store in Muskoka, I did the appropriate thing and escaped. So it's proven, this year may or may not kill me. 
If you're wondering my advice, never ever, under any circumstances go without a new years kiss. Kiss your mom, your dad, your bestie, grab your pet turtle for all I care, just kiss something! 
I know I joke around a lot, but its only because if I were to take things with any more seriousness then I do, it may cause long-term damage. So I just want to thank you for whoever reads this, and to all of you who have given me support throughout this roller coaster of a year. Please know it is appreciated and for whatever its worth, I wouldn't be here without you. I also want to apologize for my lack of humor and for my unneeded amount of complaining this post has. But hey, there is still a whole six months to turn this years rating from a "Been Hell" to an "Average". So come on, July, August, September, October, November and December...show me what you got!
[this is as close as I got to a smooch for 2011]